Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Freedom for a day

We are home and spent the evening, as Kristin said, in happy bliss. A houseful of kids and parents laughing and playing was pure heaven to us and to G. It is amazing how we have the ability to let go if even for a minute.
Mornings used to be my time, I live in a house with three girls who like to sleep in. They would sleep and I could get stuff done. The last few days getting out of bed has been difficult. I found myself staring at G again this morning, wondering what the future will bring. Wishing that I could absorb every ounce of pain that she is about to endure. I was looking at her beautiful blond hair and found myself getting sad that chances are she is going to lose it. Then it hit me, from the day she was born we tried to focus her on being pretty on the inside. I think there are times when what we try to teach our children and what we really do teach them are entirely different things. I started to feel like an ass for worrying about it. Good grief.

Team G

Adam

4 comments:

  1. Wonderful insight for all of us... Thank you so sharing your feelings.... cause of all to reflect.... Wanted to let you know that when I looked up Rhabdomyelosarcoma on the internet I came across the 'MD Anderson Center in Houston Texas.... it is said to have some of the leading experts in Rhab.... and offer the most advanced proton radiation treatments for small children....' just an FYI only...

    ReplyDelete
  2. It is natural, don't feel guilty! We love everything about our children, including their beautiful hair! Maybe you can cut a pony tail off and tie it in a ribbon (sort of like when kids get their first hair cut). The good news is that it is not permanent. You are only human - be kind to yourself...we all take things for granted and have so much to learn, and G is helping all of us reflect and realize what is truly important!

    ReplyDelete
  3. You are Amazing father Adam!!!! You and Kris Are the most loving parents.

    ReplyDelete